A long time ago I was a framing carpenter… a nail driver. I used what we called a rig axe, a 28-ounce axe head on an 18-inch hickory handle. The hammer end on that axe had a corrugated head, a waffle pattern cut into it. The squares of the pattern came to sharp points to grip the nails better. Here’s a picture of one.
After swinging that axe all day my forearm muscles would be so tired that I’d lose my grip. I’d rub pine sap on the handle to make it sticky, so it didn’t go flying out of my hand on the back-swing.
Toward the end of the day, when my grip was just about gone, I’d occasionally hit the big knuckle of my middle finger while getting a nail started. The sharp points on that corrugated head would rip the flesh of my knuckle and I’d start bleeding. I’d have to stop and put on a band-aid.
But after a few months on the job, I’d hit that middle finger so many times that it didn’t bleed any more. There was so much scar tissue built up in that spot that when I did hit it, those sharp points wouldn’t make me bleed. The blow would do some damage, but not much. That dead tissue was a lot tougher than the skin it had replaced.
On Friday, we experienced another unthinkable tragedy in this country.
My heart has been hit again. Hard.
I’m not made of granite. It hurts. Tender flesh has been torn away, and I am bleeding. But I don’t want those sharp points of tragedy that rip away at my heart to ever build up so much scar tissue that I don’t feel it any more.
I don’t ever want to become so callous that I don’t bleed.
Wow, Tim, that was incredibly, eloquently stated. Can’t wait to start your book — have like 20 pages left on the novel I’m wrapping up.
LikeLike
Thanks, Stan. Don’t you ever sleep, man?
LikeLike
Not enough. And I even had a hard Shaolin session tonight, so you’d think I’d be less driven tonight. Less working my tail off to get a couple more sales.
But nope. My delusions of grandeur continue. My ambition still burns too bright.
I may need to come visit you sometime and we can sit by the fire and you can play some music and teach me to chill the hell out.
LikeLike
Wouldn’t mind a sit down with you, but I’d never try to change anybody.
You’re doing it right, being you.
LikeLike
Damn you. There you go again.
See, that’s the way I need to have more. : )
LikeLike
Err, “be” more. Not “have” more.
LikeLike
This was so nicely put, Tim. It stills my heart just thinking about it again….but your right. We can’t stop bleeding…then we lose ourselves altogether when we don’t feel or become completely numb.
LikeLike
Thanks, Emma.
I worry about people getting numb to it all, myself included.
LikeLike
You won’t, Tim. Your heart won’t let you. Thank you for sharing your thoughts – just doing that shows that you bleed.
LikeLike
beautiful
LikeLike
Thanks so much. 🙂
LikeLike
Pingback: My brother T.W. Dittmer gives us all an amazing message on Sandy Hook…please read… « Thomas Rydder
Oooooh.
LikeLike
Hey, you. Hoping that’s a good Ooooh, not what is this stuff on my shoe Oooooh.
LikeLike
Yes, a good oooooh, not an eeeeew!
LikeLike
Incredibly written! The news about the tragedy in Newtown has shocked many; I still can’t imagine the idea of 6 year olds shot at point blank range, it makes me think of my 6 year old cousins and it makes me shudder
LikeLike
It’s left me staring at that spot on the wall.
LikeLike
I have nominated your blog for The Very Inspiring Award! Thank you for making the world a more interesting place. More details here: http://Johnwhowell.com/2012/12/17/honored-is-as-honored-does/ Thank you also for inspiring me.
John
LikeLike
Thanks, John. Always nice to know these disorganized ramblings are appreciated.
LikeLike
Wow. Simply wow. You are too gentle a soul to ever be too calloused to care. This one does hurt. Big time. We won’t forget this pain.
LikeLike
I’ve wanted to say something, but have been struck just about dumb. It’s good to be associated with a fine group of people who care.
LikeLike
I think we are all at a loss for words. But, you found some good ones.
LikeLike
Just look at the positive ripple effect you created. Memorable.
LikeLike
We’re in this together.
LikeLike
I think the fact that you recognize that there are so many blows raining down on humankind with tragedies like this means that your tender heart will not grow calluses. Beautifully written Tim.
LikeLike
It hurts. I’m angry and sad and confused.
LikeLike
Just about to post something on this.
LikeLike
I’m a bleedr too, Tim. Working on my farm I come in the house and my wife asked me, Where’s the blood.
There are many things in this crazy world we train ourselves to overlook or just not feel. That’s a good thing to some degree, but you are so correct in not wanting unimaginable tragedies to harden us. This past week is only of those times.
LikeLike
It’s hit me pretty hard.
LikeLike
This was gorgeous. I think we can begin to dread pain – become scared of bleeding – but your words remind me that when we try to ignore our feelings that’s when the real damage occurs. I had the paper on the kitchen table on Saturday, with that tragic headline and when my boyfriend came home he turned it over. But to do that is to forget and leave all those innocent souls on their own. We need to bleed so we remember. Thanks, Tim.
LikeLike
Us older guys see these things happen and tend to show nothing. We stare off into space or refuse to watch it anymore. That doesn’t mean it doesn’t hurt.
LikeLike
This was a nice, succinct post on the latest events. I ran across your blog when it was re-blogged by bodhisattvaintraining. Have purchased the Kindle version of your book – it looks like a great, escapist read for the holidays. Thanks!
LikeLike
It was late. I couldn’t sleep. The tragedy was on my mind, and I was wishing I could just stop thinking about it, wishing that I was tougher.
Then it occurred to me that I didn’t want to get to the point where these things don’t affect me.
I hope you like the book.
LikeLike
I think we should all be very afraid of the day when events like this don’t impact us. Some hit a little harder than others.
LikeLike
Yes, we have to hurt in order to live.
LikeLike
I’m with you. We can’t become numb to these horrors; when we do, they will have died aimlessly. I really appreciate that you liked my 2012 Blue Birds, and hope that maybe when you have a moment, you’ll come back and read one of my pieces. Happy New Year, Tim! I’m glad we met through lovely Eden.
LikeLike
again, so well said. there’s something in the way you wrote this that reminds me of raymond carver. have you read his stuff? he’s one of my all time fave writers… xo, sm
LikeLike
Haven’t read Carver, but I’ll have to. You’ve got me smiling pretty big over here. Thanks.
LikeLike
what’s interesting is that he does both poetry and short stories, as i see that you do. he also writes about the every man and i’ve always really liked that. you have got to check him out. i’d love to know what you think… sm
LikeLike